Can't Light Up? 3 Easy Alternatives to Get Lit.

We put together his handy little guide to help you still get lit, without sparking one up.

Sometimes we get stuck in a situation where we can’t just roll one up and start puffing. Every smoker has their tricks to get away with sneaking away for a puff here and there, but what do you do when you can't smoke?

Luckily, it's 2021 and technology is on our side! There are plenty of other ways to get the benefits of smoking and still maintain a little bit of discretion. Without further ado, here are our alternatives to smoking that work for stoners like us.

Mask the Odor of Your Gas.

Discretion has long been the alternative to smoking. Well before modern technology blessed us with vape pens and concentrates or easily accessible edibles, stoners who enjoy smoking a bowl or rolling a joint have had to come up with a way to secretly smoke or cover up the tell tale odor of having just burned one when no one was looking.

Some of us remember stuffing dryer sheets into empty toilet paper rolls and blowing out smoke through that to cover the odor. Some of us still do that when necessary. Hey, you do what you need to to get the job done, right? 

The modern day equivalent of that is the Smoke Buddy or Smoke Buddy Junior. This has been tried and tested by all of us at Atomic Blaze Smoke Shop Online in Sarasota, FL. Don't believe it? Here's a review on the Smoke Buddy:

Both sized Smoke Buddy's use the same concept of the dryer sheets in the tube technology, but take it a step further if you can believe it and use carbon filtering to eliminate 90% of the smell of whatever you’re smoking. 

But wait, you never heard about the dryer sheet method? To keep it easy, here's how you do it:

1. Take an empty toilet paper cardboard tube or paper towel tube.

2. Stuff multiple dryer sheets into the tube.

3. Inhale the good isht. 

4. Exhale into your tube

5. Enjoy the fresh smell of laundry!

If that's not enough to clear the air, try the Blunt Blaster Air Freshener for those really heavy hits. Leave it to stoners to revolutionize air quality.

But What if Smoking Is Not an Option?

Can’t fire it up? Fear not. Vaping has become a widely accepted way to puff in public or privately because of the limited amount of stank that comes out of the lithium ion battery heating technology of the variable voltage 510 threaded vaporizers.

The biggest downside about vaping is when your 510 battery dies. It’s the technological equivalent of having a joint but no lighter, which is the stoner’s nightmare. 

PSA: Remember to charge your vape battery every couple of days.

While the battery capacity doesn't change, we really like the double sided vape from Dazz Vape. 

So what is a two sided vape? They are 510 Thread Variable Voltage double sided vapes that can accommodate two standard 510 threaded cartridges on each end of the vape pen battery. 

If you can’t decide which oil you want to take with you to your secret happy place, a 2 sided vape will at least give you choices if you change your mind once you leave the house. Also, if you are sharing with a friend, each of you has the ability to share a social-distancing session without sharing germs.

Other vape pens to consider are variable voltage battery pens. This way if you have thick oil or concentrate to vape the heating mechanism can be adjusted to burn your product at the right temperature. The 510 Vape Battery from Dazz Vape called the U-Key has a discrete, palm sized design that makes it easy to take this pen anywhere and sneak in a puff whenever you need it. 

The 510 battery fits most standard cartridges and comes in a variety of colors. Best of all, it is durable for on the go vaping so no need to worry about breaking a glass pipe in your pocket.

The Dazzvape Click 510 Vaporizer is even cooler, with a switchblade-like pop out mechanism that hides the cartridge when not in use, and cleverly flips out with the touch of a button. 

Design-wise, they don't get better than this because it solves the stoner problem of sitting down with a pen in your pocket and breaking the cartridge off the top of the battery.

Just Eat It.

Still need something better than smoking or vaping to get your through a long day or unbearably dry event? Someone somewhere once said not to go anywhere on an empty stomach. 

Someone else said bring snacks. Actually,weI say both of those things so naturally edibles make this list.

Discretion is delicious these days. Edibles are becoming available at most legal smoking retailers and having a few gummy bears or special brownies on hand can save the day when you can’t light up. They take a little longer to kick than vaping or smoking but give yourself a good hour for them to reach their full effect and the rest of the day will be smooth sailing.

So remember, it takes time. Don't overdo it or double up on dosing prematurely!

Some places offer breath sprays and mints that have the secret ingredient we all love so much, so popping an edible can be as normal and unnoticeable as eating a Tic-Tac. 

Tinctures

Oral tinctures usually come in a bottle with a little eye dropper to dispense the oily goodness as a sublingual, so those can get awkward if you have to explain to anyone who might not be in the know exactly what it is you’re taking by mouth. "EASY MOM. I AM TAKING VALERIAN ROOT."

To easily hide it though, just add it to your coffee and bring it with you in a reusable mug. After all, you don’t want to set down your carefully crafted coffee in a paper cup only for someone to confuse it with their own. #CryNow

If you can't get your hands on a premade edible treat, then try making your own at home. There are plenty of stoner friendly recipes online. But if you can get your hands on some de-carboxylated distillates, then you can squeeze that sticky gold goo into a delectable Peanut Butter Cup or any other confection your stoner heart desires without having to cook for yourself.

Patches

It’s very likely that when you first heard of medicinal patches, that you day dreamed about the size blanket you’d need to satisfy your desire to be wrapped in nature’s best remedy. 

Unfortunately, transdermal patches don’t give us the euphoria we’re used to from products with the same ingredients, but they do offer some relief from body pain and overall anxiety. You probably would need a patch the size of a sleeping bag to get off from one, but if all else fails, you can tell them it’s a nicotine patch and maybe they’ll leave you alone. 

Wrapping it Up

Don't ever feel like you can't enjoy yourself when you can't smoke. A prepared stoner is a happy stoner.